


John Johnson and Johnson

by bitchmarner



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Babies, Crack, Future Fic, Kid Fic, M/M, self aware fictional goalies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-23
Updated: 2016-06-23
Packaged: 2018-07-16 18:42:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 861
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7280299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bitchmarner/pseuds/bitchmarner
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bitty and Jack have adopted their first child after being happily married for eight years. One day, not long after they bring their little girl home, they receive a large gift basket with no name attached.</p>
            </blockquote>





	John Johnson and Johnson

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this in 30 mins enjoy (not beta'd)

After Bitty and Jack adopt their first child, a baby they named Clarissa May (Claire for short), they receive a giant gift basket on their doorstep. There isn't a card or any sort of information regarding who or where it was from. The basket itself is nearly overflowing and full of baby shampoos, lotions, you name it, all for newborns and infants. There are even a few adult products, presumably for Jack and Bitty themselves  
They shrug it off as a kind gift and go on with their day, assuming that it was some friend who sent it, or family  


It isn't until a few days later, Jack is giving Claire her pre-bedtime bath as Bitty makes dinner in the kitchen that it clicks  
Jack is quietly singing to Claire, distracting her from the water that she decidedly hates with a passion, (it's a phase, he hopes, please let it just be a phase) when Jack picks up a bottle of baby shampoo and reads the label  
"Johnson's Baby Shampoo with calming lavender." Jack reads aloud, pondering why the name feels so significant to him. His eyes widen as he calls for his husband as calmly as he can. 

"Bits, come in here please?" Jack asks, angling his head towards the door. He desperately hopes he was able to mask the confusion he was experiencing.  
He hears Bitty's light footsteps as he makes his way down the hall to the main bathroom  
"You need help, darling?" He asks, stopping at the door and smiling at his husband and daughter.  
"Yeah, uh, do me a favor and read the label on the shampoo?" He motions slightly with his head to the bottle he had placed on the edge of the tub  
Bitty eyes jack, slightly confused, but does as he's asked.  
He skims the bottle, reading the ingredients and description, mumbling slightly to himself before looking up with a start  
"Johnson and..." Bitty stars before quickly trailing off. "You don't think..? Do you really think it's him?" Bitty asks, setting the bottle down near the sink.  
"It's been 8 years since anyone heard from him, right? Nothing after we got married and he just kinda disappeared?" Bitty asks.  
Jack shrugs.  


"I wouldn't doubt it. He always was a weird one, eh?" Jack says, wrapping up Claire in a towel after rinsing her off.  
"But, why now? Why after 8 years?" Bitty ponders, shaking his head slightly  
His phone pings in the kitchen and he excuses himself to go check it.

After Jack has dressed Claire, he heads to the dining room to where Bitty has put dinner on the table, but doesn't find his husband there.

"Bitty?" Jack calls out, wondering why he isn't waiting for him in the dining room

Jack checks the living room, finding it empty, before hearing a small noise in the kitchen that sounds like Bitty's soft snickering. Jack enters, a question on his tongue when Bitty turns around and hands Jack his cell phone. Jack's eyes widen at the wall of text on the screen

"Dear Eric and Jack, wow it's kinda weird to say that again. It's weird to be alive again. Well, as alive as a fictional character in a fictional world in another alternate fictional universe could ever be. Anyways. I hope you enjoy the gift basket I left for you. Kinda cool that I own the company now, huh? The author thought it would be a fun plot device, and now look where we are! You two have a kid now, how fun is that? I bet she's great. Anyways, have fun, hope you have great lives. I'll be in touch if anyone needs a convenient wacky character to fill in plot holes. Bye!"

Jack looks up as he finishes reading the text, handing the phone back to Bitty and readjusting Claire against his chest

"Huh. How convenient was the timing on that?" Jack asks, not quite believing what he just read.

"Johnson always was a weird one," Bitty sighs "but at least he was nice enough to send us that basket."

Jack ponders for a second, wondering if the same thing would happen to any of the other original Samwell team when their children arrived. Bitty's phone chimes with another text "Guess you'll just have to wait and see, Jacky boy. Guess you'll just have to wait and see." Bitty reads aloud.

Okay, this is officially the weirdest thing Johnson has ever done. Jack thinks, shaking his head.

"That's so odd." Bitty says "Anyways, we need to eat, dinners probably already cold." He reaches out for Claire, and cradles her in his arms as Jack hands her to him.  
"And someone is getting sleepy." He kisses the top of Claire's head, and walks with her to the living room where they have a bassinet set up.  
Jack quietly walks behind Bitty, smiling softly as his husband places their daughter down. Bitty kisses her head before straightening up and smiling at Jack's dopey face. Sharing a small kiss as they meet near the door, they join hands and head to the dining room together to sit down for a nice meal.

 

~fin~


End file.
